A certain light: a memoir of family, loss and hope

Product Description "Life is not defined by the bad things that happen to us. It certainly isn't for me." Written for her young son so that he would know what had happened to his mother, Cynthia Banham's inspiring family memoir uncovers a true picture of what survival means: "This book tells a story that I tried to write many times before, but couldn't. For a long time, it was too painful to tell. It is also one I hadn't known how to tell. It had to be more than a story about surviving a plane crash, a random event without intrinsic meaning." Unable until now to write her own story, Cynthia found that the lives of her Italian grandfather, Alfredo, and his intriguing older sister, Amelia, resonated with her own. Discovering their sacrifice, joy, fear, and love, from Trieste to Germany and America, and finally to Australia, their stories mirror and illuminate Cynthia's own determination and courage in the face of overwhelming adversity. From a remarkable writer, and told with unflinching honesty and compassion, A Certain Light speaks to the heart of what really matters in life. Review "As her book progresses, she is able to circle closer and closer to the event ­itself, to stare at the sun. The account she tenders is harrowing but clear-eyed. The inheritance Banham is determined to leave is not sorrow, but resilience anchored in a profound and fierce love. As A Certain Light powerfully attests, this was her inheritance, too." —Australian About the Author Cynthia Banham is a writer. She worked as a solicitor and, later, a journalist. Cynthia completed a Doctor of Philosophy and a Master in International Affairs at the Australian National University. In 2015 she was awarded a UQ Fellowship at the University of Queensland to research and teach in the School of Political Science and International Studies. Her first book, Liberal Democracies and the Torture of Their Citizens, based on her doctoral thesis, was published in 2017. She is currently a Visitor at the ANU's School of Regulation and Global Governance (RegNet). Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved. A Certain LightA Memoir of Family, Loss and HopeBy Cynthia BanhamAllen & UnwinCopyright © 2018 Cynthia BanhamAll rights reserved.ISBN: 978-1-76063-210-6ContentsPrologue: A Letter to My Son, 1 The Boxes, 2 Trieste, 3 Searching, 4 Alfredo, 5 Michael, 6 Loredana, 7 Crashing, Acknowledgements, Notes, Bibliography, CHAPTER 1The BoxesII LAY ON MY BACK ON THE HOSPITAL BED, under a dark blue, speckled blanket, as a male orderly steered me towards the familiar swinging doors. Another operating theatre. Another surgical removal of a piece of me.Although this time it was only a minor part — a bone spur from the end of my right tibia that was preventing me from walking on prostheses — it would be taken while I was unconscious, with no control over what was being done to me, over how much of my leg bone would ultimately be taken. The thought of losing more of myself this way was, in this moment, overwhelming.A young woman doctor directed Michael where to wait, so the medical staff could find him when I was out of recovery.'Follow this red line,' she said, pointing to the floor.Michael smiled at me. I could see he was reluctant to go; he didn't leave until I was out of sight.In the operating theatre, the anaesthetist searched for a compliant vein. He was experienced, but the first effort failed. I don't have many places for a cannula to go; the only accessible veins are in my right arm.Outside was the Canberra winter. It was minus five when we arrived at hospital earlier that morning. In the operating room the air was hot. I heard the beeping of the monitoring machines that, to me, always signal personal peril. The room was filled with doctors and nurses. I could hear some of them discussing antibiotics.'Just one gram?''Well, she's only small.'With no lower limbs, I suppose I was.The vascular surgeon must have seen my tears, though I tried to